Archive for justice


Posted in Elliana Trinity, jt, Veritas et Aeuqtias with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 31, 2013 by norcaliluv

She sings for me,

Like summer rains on a dry land.

She smiles at me,

And takes my heart in her hand.


I see light, I see love

I see the Truth in her eyes

I saw hope, when I saw you

Every moment till we said goodbye.


She sings to me

To say it’s been so sad

She redeems in me

Every things they called “bad”


I see light, I see love

In revolution coloured eyes

I felt time,  prayed for calm

On sweetest forgiveness I relies.




My Dearest Elliana,

My words are powerless to express the brilliance of the flame you command in my heart. That any reader may know the words above born on no cheap sentiment.  Rather true treasure born across the darkest and most barren sea never sailed….. For one fell and leaving such beauty for an unjust and painful eternity. Seeing clearly; as it should, clarifies and resolves firstly, personal guilt. I therefore bearing no lack of culpability, sentence myself to life without parole. To be by your side baby, every moment that you wish and need until there is no life in me. It kills me to see you confused with regard to your self-worth my love. The whole  world comes to life when I look at you! I rely; as life requires water I depend on your sweet forgiveness and mercy.  It was such a sweet suffering to see you! Sweet because to me you are every good and beautiful expression of the Divine. Then painful to think how lonely you have been and so so brave against all odds. Yet I hope you soon forget our separation Elliana.  I on the other hand must NEVER forget it, having nothing of good in this life were I to fail you at love… You will be here soon..!



100% Real = 100% Alone

Posted in jt with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 11, 2013 by norcaliluv

I have always been a man of the heart, struggling first and almost completely for the truth alone. I have ever been willing to admit my wrongs and suffer whatever consequences they carry. Yet I have more love for a stranger than ANY one of my so called family has for me. Since about age 13 I’ve been ready to leave this delusion you all call society. I have studied and struggled for years and beyond the education and experience of those “above” me. Now my little girl is kept from me? This world will recognize the intense love in my heart and at the very least leave me alone. Or it will have to destroy me. I am ready to show the people of the world that love exists in my heart, REAL LOVE full and unconditional. But how can I go show this to the world and leave my flesh and blood in the hands of hypocrites?? Not possible. Those who would get in my way will be introduced to all of lifes answers….. I am JT alone in the world but for my flesh and blood; Elliana Trinity Saldana, and I will not be separated from her. Soon I will write down all the details of my situation but for now know that my struggle is before you fully honest and righteous. I am a soulja ready to die yesterday and over my dead body is the only way she will be raised by these punks.

Keep it real or shut up
Don’t seem to be, just be…..


Cowardly Me?

Posted in jt, monolog, Uncategorized, Veritas et Aeuqtias with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 27, 2013 by norcaliluv

The only cowards that I see, are men presumptuous enough to label other men cowards. A crime I observe and commit enough to see it’s horrible effects. Stop it! ALL of creation is good. Yet I still fight….? I too fight an illusion. I am no teacher to sermonize from on high. I wear my singlet and report to the mat of life. I wrestle the unknown and he pins me again and again. Paul Trout a world class chef, my friend and at one time my sons wrestling coach, presented this concept to the young men.. The sport of wrestling is one that requires a certain amount of character in which you can bravely confront your fears. Therefore, whether they win them all or lose them all, the boys that step out onto that mat till the end are worthy of recognition. So pin me. I fear not the weak judgment of other men. As a child I trust that there is too much out there for me to know. No one is completely right…. But if you look and see the fruit of peace, this tree has strong immovable and ancient roots. Draw from that one and cease drawing “wisdom” from men bent on violence. One who understands really can have no hatred or aggression as you and I. If we close our eye and ears to the deeds of others our true vision can regain its focus.



The Sun Wakes One..

Posted in jt with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 24, 2012 by norcaliluv

The sun wakes one,

But is unable to warm the bones with-in.

While masses consume food and warmth by the ton.

Tomorrow will find others still frail and thin.


With an animosity that refuses to tire ….

Loneliness, despair and hunger attack.

Just as a coal separated from the fire,

The soul alone turns cold and black.


All men fall down,

But only some are left behind

Is there guilt in that “some”

To justify men’s judgment unkind?


Cast down your gaze…

See the world the humble see.

It will truly amaze,

To deny oneself, makes ones soul soar free.


I have sat alone in suffering.

My heart been filled with self-pity and revenge.

Step by painful step I get closer to the ring.

Thankful for life, the light of new days no longer makes me cringe.


Courage and blessing to those who struggle alone…


Posted in jt with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 12, 2012 by norcaliluv

Set them alone and be lonely with them.


Take away their toys and be bored with them.


Don’t forget to spank them, remember also to cry with them.


If you are much prone to talking, it is right then if you listen to them.


Love never abandons the guilty one, it ever stays and suffers with them.


They will fail and they will fall. May we never cease to have mercy on them.


I wish that I could remember, and never fail to see….


It’s all about them and not about me


Of all the sin that we commit… We should fear most, our injustice towards the little ones.  When we condition them for injustice and demand for them to ignore our hypocrisies we alienate them from the Divine. We gladly build for them a great wall of skepticism and resentment. We all do carry the weight of guilt and we can turn to Him without fear. May God have mercy on us, and heal our children. May we be ever more vigilant to be just, kind, humble, and merciful.

convince and control no DEMONSTRATE AND INSPIRE…

Careful With Those Thoughts!

Posted in jt, monolog, Veritas et Aeuqtias with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 6, 2012 by norcaliluv

Watch your thoughts, they become words. Watch your words, they become actions. Watch your actions, they become habits. Watch your habits, they become your character. Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.

Author Unknown

It has even been said that it was written by a man bearing the last name of Outlaw. Of course I like this best. Be careful and brave, then you can see personal guilt. If could comprehend our own wickedness we would cease to judge and would forgive without difficulty. If love ceases to remain then loneliness and death will take us away. The road to hell is paved with course thoughts, accusations and judgement. Not good intentions. Again lets be brave and make love our destiny. Your failing friend and co-traveler JT

Posted from WordPress for Android with love.. JT

Tid Bits

Posted in jt, politics, Veritas et Aeuqtias with tags , , , , , on March 9, 2010 by norcaliluv

    As I have recently shared with you my strong feelings of disapproval towards the Redding Police Department.  I would like to say that my judgments of self are just as harsh.  I am in the middle of a divorce now, and have made many selfish and illegal decisions in recent months.  In the last year I confess that I left my little princess for many months.  I got in trouble with the law used lots and lots of drugs, and worst of all I shot myself on accident, intending to get revenge on others.  I have a knack for screwing things up big when I screw them up.  In my opinion, cowards leave their children to chance and do not nurture protect and guide them through this crazy world.  If my math is correct that makes me a coward.  I believe that we all have before us each day, the choices that define us as the days hero or the days coward.  If you are breathing I would be willing to bet that you have made decisions of both kinds.  I am not satisfied with the decisions of months past and am making new ones in the hope that I will be Ellianas hero.  I do not sit up here and write about injustice as though I have not committed some myself.  To justify over and over that you have some kind of right to act in a way that causes others pain is the evil I hate. To look down your nose at the weakness of others is despicable.   We really do have an obligation to uplift and support one another, no matter what our place in society.  Especially in these times.  We need each other!  Care for one another,  take injustice personally and seriously.  To people of all positions: Keep your chin up and make this a better community with a smile and a helping hand.   I need the love and support of those around me and I have shed rivers of tears for my foolishness.  If you suffer alone as sometimes I do, please keep your thoughts heavenward and may God send you an angel to lift you up.   I am jt, a struggling father and a horrible sinner.  I am striving for something bigger and greater than the hypocrisies of this foolish world.  Lets do this…..  God bless.

Your friend and co-sufferer


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