Archive for compassion

Lord… When were you imprisoned and I didn’t visit you?

Posted in jt, monolog, Veritas et Aeuqtias with tags , , , , , , , , , , on May 22, 2013 by norcaliluv

I was excited today to launch a FB page for a close friend who is paying a toll to the injustice system. So many times we forget our suffering fellows and it is hard with all the distractions to remember those separate from us and how they suffer. The page is meant to make if easy for all those who would not for what ever reason take the time to sit down and write to him. How much time do we spend in front of this thing??? Do this! For your friend or family member kept away from you. Let them know that they are loved and maybe when they get home we can keep them. Divine, powerful, intentional yet unconditional love is the ONLY way we will have healing. Young people; you need no title or recognition. Do what I know is in your hearts and heal, love and minister to one another. Your elders are become cold in heart and blindly critical. Don’t you dare grow up! For it is Christ Himself who has said. “Unless you become like a child you cannot enter the Kingdom of Heaven.” Not childish but innocent and always willing and eager to learn new things. Don’t get right get love.

jt

Search FB for A student and Novice I post there things not posted here….

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Just a bit of my perspective….

Posted in jt, monolog, Veritas et Aeuqtias with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 9, 2013 by norcaliluv

At eight years of age I was baptised at Sacred Heart Church in Anderson, California. I was attending the private school there with the financial help of my grandpa and grandma. I remember being so excited to be able to learn about God in school. This turned out to be a mistake and to suffices to say that I was utterly rejected by “the people of God”. Later in my teenage years I attended protestant churches being constantly assured that I needed to “get right”. Then later and during my 3 years and 8 months in youth prison ( California Youth Authority or CYA) I practiced Buddhism, martial arts, male hula, and served in a military program at N.A. Chaderjian called simply the Cadets. I also attended some courses from the private school UOP in Stockton and read cool stuff like “The Prophet” by Kahlil Gibran. I can in no way sumarize the variety of types I was around for those years. After my release from CYA and during the first part of my marriage I attended Bethel Church in Redding, CA a very popular “renewal church”. I also attended some of their first School of Ministry courses. I am now an Orthodox Christian and know I spend the rest of my life in conversion ever reaching for, ever incapable of loves boundless selflessness. For the Christian at least, there is nothing to compare with Orthodoxy in the purity of its transmission of grace from then to now. Ive been diluted and ill-informed, rejected and judged, belittled and mocked by ALL of these groups. So I would encourage you fellow traveler and strugglers, let us keep our gaze upward from whence comes our help and every good thing. All men fail so pathetically to perform love. But then draw close then to one who though he sins he weeps and cries.  To God and his brothers here in humility for forgiveness. God has not given us the power to truly see into the mystery of guilt and innocence in the heart of another. Virtue is PURELY an INSIDE job and any moral rightness applied outside oneself is plain wickedness and is why God has said; “Judge not and thou shall not be judged!” One big reason I believe governments and police are unnatural and harmful. If God is good what can he do or create that is bad?  Only through our misunderstanding or ignorance are “evils” committed in this world. The wickedness of religious groups is fueled by the unnatural anxiety of being right or wrong. This in my mind is related very easily to the fall of man when were separated from the Truth, and grew then to fear deception. It really shows when so called christians go out in joy to dominate anthers intellects and and reveal their “sins”.  Say this magic prayer and all is well, your ticket to heaven is in the mail. THen it then comes with a guarantee that this dollar store salvation cannot be lost….. WAKE UP! You moralize the people with your cheap smokescreen of virtues and so become like the pharisee a white washed tomb. Gaining the Virtues is like going to the gym to bulk up. You never own the virtue you merely tend to it and exercise it or it is unnoticeable and of no effect in your journey. Men who claim to posses them, only declare their ignorance of them. No man is just good! We only struggle together towards it. Only God is without any form of incompleteness. We fully need Him and it seems, we mostly learn good things from each other “by accident” having no love and little respect for each other.

(to be continued.. Helping with a friends B-Day party)

I launch an all out assault on division, judgment and hatred among all men……..

The Revolution is within, pay attention to the war inside and become indomitable from without!

Wake from the Nightmare

Posted in jt, Uncategorized, Veritas et Aeuqtias with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 14, 2013 by norcaliluv

Friends,

FEAR NOT
In my life I have found that ANY so-called “knowledge” that inspires fear is flawed and should be discarded. Fear can be healthy only as applies when one is ignorant of something. All true knowledge should empower and if that knowledge in some way criticizes, it happens within. So if you are taught to fear I humbly suggest looking for knowledge where there is peace and not anxiety..

blessings to you all.
jt

 

this is great!!!

 

http://www.danoah.com/2013/04/the-disease-called-perfection.html

Intro to truth

Posted in jt, monolog, Saint grandma, Uncategorized, Veritas et Aeuqtias with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 8, 2013 by norcaliluv

KNOWING

I am looking back through the fog of rejection and judgment that we collectively call childhood. Even now with my eyes I look and though hard of hearing I hear enough to know that the words on your lips are empty. You ever encourage me give in to your hypocrisy by “getting over it.” And the sign of this is that I would begin to chase paper and act as though I have God, knowing nothing of Him. You are all instructors that know how to analyze the character of others. JT, please don’t express these things that make us uncomfortable, my my you are so angry….. Please Jason stop talking. Ok I will. But I will also no more listen to your cheap claims of wisdom. Men who fear the opinions of men, may your fake words fall to the ground. I draw breath here hoping for what is to come NOT your foolishness and not your idea of success. You truly own no wisdom. You are spouter’s of cliché, and slogan totters. I have only ever from a tender young age desired blessing for those around me yet in this world I spent much of my youth incarcerated or in some program to “fix” me. Never protected and ever accused. Now I am supposed to tolerate all men having endured only judgment and rejection in this oasis of hypocrisy. You first accuse me, well so do I. Sharing none of your weakness clinging to cowardice and avoidance. One man go and kill a bunch of precious children and your first concern is where he got the gun. You fools! WE are fully guilty, expecting the divine soul of man to endure such wickedness and injustice. When I was young (too young) you taught me deception and lewdness then accused me of breeding these things out of my own young heart. Both sides of my family growing up despised my presence. They are of course concerned like most, that they would not be shown to have any guilt in a given situation. Don’t know what I am talking about? Everyone shrugs as to say that I am blind, stubborn and unrepentant. Why? Cuz I don’t enjoy bullshit pie. Y’all are so thin in character. Over time I feel myself losing love, wonder and joy. As most of my life I have primarily been acutely explosive in response to your accusation, getting over things pretty fast. Now I have struggled many years of over and under doing this self-accusation thing. Seeing you know nothing of my soul or even yours I have a glowing coal of murder and hate under the surface. Truly, messing with a soul as mine now would be quite foolish.

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“It is not the violence that sets a man apart…. All right it is  the distance he is prepared to go..”
Forest Bondaraunt “Lawless”

 

Seeing the cheapness of the world I have no humor for your arrogance and intimidation. I promise one thing here. I’m done; and though killing be far from my desire, it is a breaths distance from any seeking my harm. Hell 90% of gangstas are more like mouthy two year olds with guns. With many legal excuses have you bound my young soul. If I were to make it a seminar my tee shirt would read unloved, unforgiven and unworthy. I long for the revelation of my sin and yours. Your mask of false virtue will fade when you long most to hold it tight. Nothing we can devise will deceive Him who sees all. Being not the Judge I have no desire to hold you accountable. You cause me fresh wounds and in the same breath instead of your repentance my acceptance of your lies and falsities is demanded of me. Even now I sit alone because I don’t tickle your egos with submission to your delusion. You can sit there and smirk cuz the light of heaven will show what truly is. I know not one soul willing travel where I go. I would like to say here that I have no desire to lead or teach men, only that you keep your emptiness to yourself. Though weak and at times in need of your benevolence, I can scarcely endure your self-proclaimed wisdom anymore. I do not know where I will go but you can be sure that I am not coming back to you. I cannot asses my own strengths and weaknesses but by the Grace of God I will not be reconquered by the world.

Here is my case; in whatever form I may choose. Poems, parables, critiques and works of fiction. Painting and sketching the truth alone, if you doubt don’t waste your time, go ahead and fuck off. The author has no need of any readership, I write to heal needing no hypocrites rebuttal. I hope now for strength from God to focus now and leave behind the life of proud liars. For I am guilty as the rest. I can endure no more this dance of delusion. I know not which label will be pasted again over my true image but your self-absorbed opinions carry no weight with me. I use wit and philosophy and I create no legal document, for no man really holds the facts. Awe go ahead! Unleash your plastic criticism and judge my sin filled soul. I am free and only by grace alone is any good thing givin unto me.

JT

How far will I go friends?

How far will I go friends?

How many faces, for the undivided soul?

Posted in jt, monolog, Veritas et Aeuqtias with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 7, 2013 by norcaliluv

   Lord have mercyI am one full of love, as God intended……. But

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAInside this outlaw will walk free to da end, stay in repentance to the last day..

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAThen often standing at the edge I rage with horns and burning eye. I desire love but only God can free from violence inside.

Violence is easy. I have seen it committed with all the seriousness of jumping into cold water. Grown men fascinated, bound by childish curiosity and  many fears.  I wanna break these horns and find new ears deaf to all hate…. I’d rather be  just a plain ol sufferer, but I’m not.

A tired and wounded lion lives here,  just waiting for peace and release….

Miles of error and gallons of tears, have made this outlaw desire some rest. It’s from this position here seems the Divine hears me best.

lfstry2

Pray my freedom! Love is the only way!

 jt

Dear Friends,

    If you have room for knowledge then know there is but one Judge and still only one accuser mentioned to the followers of Christ. If you be  a mortal man, how then do you the work of satan every moment of the day?! For you accuse with every breath your fellow man and as a man bent on his own destruction I follow, sometimes lead down this path. How and by what means, O foolish man did you see into the heart of another?  Having so little knowledge of your own? Who calibrated the scale of justice you use? A BLIND man! The Lord Almighty is mans only true judge. Keep your facts and your evidence, they can only mock one as sinful  as I. That “rightness” you claim with your mouth has yet to be seen.  Me I am wrong, try and wait patiently for true knowledge revealed in truth and inside. Lawless I’m free your imaginary virtue these hard days wont endure. America is around 2 bills old…….. Christianity was punishable by death with varying intensity for the first 300 years of its existence. Outlaw I’m the Anti-G, my life is to give and not take… May God awaken Truth is our hearts fellow travelers. Blessings on this truly uphill battle.

jt

Innocent fervor betrayed

Posted in jt, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 27, 2013 by norcaliluv

Dear so and so you thought a saint.?

I’ll tell you my child

I will prove that he aint.

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This one there he is pious you say?

silly nave just look here,

see how dark? Oh the price he must pay.

*

Wait my child be informed before you go,

fifty more great men have I listed here.

Really they fail and I thought you should know.

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What man for me a mockery of what I hold inside?

Come an orphan sure of hope

And felt the sting of wicked words, met only disdain and pride.

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Though hero’s strive, which stay afloat upon this ocean of sin?

The righteous one then becomes thus

Returning to the Divine again and again.

*******

Satan accuses, but we children, let us choose the path of love. Love covers and does not expose. Love believes in spite of rational court data. Guilt lies in the heart and this we cannot see. Sin is common the humble and repentant are not.

Freedom: Handle with care….

Posted in jt with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 16, 2013 by norcaliluv

I am coming to see a little more how precious, fragile and personal is the human soul. I watch, eyes filled with hot tears as we heap injustice and control on the little ones. We control and assault them with our inadequacies and hypocrisies. Respect, question not and obey!Lord have mercy. I am an Orthodox Christian (while a very poor one forgive me) and so I know of form, order, rule and tradition. I look there and I find NOTHING that binds. Except my friend only that we bind one another with wicked, cheap,  hypocritical opinions and judgment. Please I beg you….. We have NO place to label the little ones good and bad. Have mercy my friend, for their teachers are full of folly and wickedness and in no wise belong in these positions.  Let us repent and believe in the little ones, they are far more able to see  and learn from God then us tired and prideful fakes. I don’t mean in this to attack at all for we all fail, or our world would not reflect such wickedness and suffering. Only consider how we heap complex evils on them (deviance and the like)  Then say the child owns some guilt like the guilt we grown seasoned sinners carry every day. Impossible and unjust! Lord have mercy on us and give us the strength to confess our wickedness. That it maybe removed forever from memory. That we could grow once again towards You.

Believe in the goodness of His creation!!
Believe in the the little ones.
JT

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