Archive for art

Intro to truth

Posted in jt, monolog, Saint grandma, Uncategorized, Veritas et Aeuqtias with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 8, 2013 by norcaliluv


I am looking back through the fog of rejection and judgment that we collectively call childhood. Even now with my eyes I look and though hard of hearing I hear enough to know that the words on your lips are empty. You ever encourage me give in to your hypocrisy by “getting over it.” And the sign of this is that I would begin to chase paper and act as though I have God, knowing nothing of Him. You are all instructors that know how to analyze the character of others. JT, please don’t express these things that make us uncomfortable, my my you are so angry….. Please Jason stop talking. Ok I will. But I will also no more listen to your cheap claims of wisdom. Men who fear the opinions of men, may your fake words fall to the ground. I draw breath here hoping for what is to come NOT your foolishness and not your idea of success. You truly own no wisdom. You are spouter’s of cliché, and slogan totters. I have only ever from a tender young age desired blessing for those around me yet in this world I spent much of my youth incarcerated or in some program to “fix” me. Never protected and ever accused. Now I am supposed to tolerate all men having endured only judgment and rejection in this oasis of hypocrisy. You first accuse me, well so do I. Sharing none of your weakness clinging to cowardice and avoidance. One man go and kill a bunch of precious children and your first concern is where he got the gun. You fools! WE are fully guilty, expecting the divine soul of man to endure such wickedness and injustice. When I was young (too young) you taught me deception and lewdness then accused me of breeding these things out of my own young heart. Both sides of my family growing up despised my presence. They are of course concerned like most, that they would not be shown to have any guilt in a given situation. Don’t know what I am talking about? Everyone shrugs as to say that I am blind, stubborn and unrepentant. Why? Cuz I don’t enjoy bullshit pie. Y’all are so thin in character. Over time I feel myself losing love, wonder and joy. As most of my life I have primarily been acutely explosive in response to your accusation, getting over things pretty fast. Now I have struggled many years of over and under doing this self-accusation thing. Seeing you know nothing of my soul or even yours I have a glowing coal of murder and hate under the surface. Truly, messing with a soul as mine now would be quite foolish.


“It is not the violence that sets a man apart…. All right it is  the distance he is prepared to go..”
Forest Bondaraunt “Lawless”


Seeing the cheapness of the world I have no humor for your arrogance and intimidation. I promise one thing here. I’m done; and though killing be far from my desire, it is a breaths distance from any seeking my harm. Hell 90% of gangstas are more like mouthy two year olds with guns. With many legal excuses have you bound my young soul. If I were to make it a seminar my tee shirt would read unloved, unforgiven and unworthy. I long for the revelation of my sin and yours. Your mask of false virtue will fade when you long most to hold it tight. Nothing we can devise will deceive Him who sees all. Being not the Judge I have no desire to hold you accountable. You cause me fresh wounds and in the same breath instead of your repentance my acceptance of your lies and falsities is demanded of me. Even now I sit alone because I don’t tickle your egos with submission to your delusion. You can sit there and smirk cuz the light of heaven will show what truly is. I know not one soul willing travel where I go. I would like to say here that I have no desire to lead or teach men, only that you keep your emptiness to yourself. Though weak and at times in need of your benevolence, I can scarcely endure your self-proclaimed wisdom anymore. I do not know where I will go but you can be sure that I am not coming back to you. I cannot asses my own strengths and weaknesses but by the Grace of God I will not be reconquered by the world.

Here is my case; in whatever form I may choose. Poems, parables, critiques and works of fiction. Painting and sketching the truth alone, if you doubt don’t waste your time, go ahead and fuck off. The author has no need of any readership, I write to heal needing no hypocrites rebuttal. I hope now for strength from God to focus now and leave behind the life of proud liars. For I am guilty as the rest. I can endure no more this dance of delusion. I know not which label will be pasted again over my true image but your self-absorbed opinions carry no weight with me. I use wit and philosophy and I create no legal document, for no man really holds the facts. Awe go ahead! Unleash your plastic criticism and judge my sin filled soul. I am free and only by grace alone is any good thing givin unto me.


How far will I go friends?

How far will I go friends?


Sight to Sound

Posted in jt with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 29, 2012 by norcaliluv

I want so desperately to be able to communicate what is alive in my soul. My love falls down sheer cliffs of neglect or personal ideals unreached. I am failing in many ways but I have had the ideals of hero’s. I hope to bless you but I am unsure about poems that, like this one are almost random gushes of self expression. I’m not sure that it is a joy for others to read. I hope so. May God bless you with strength for every struggle you encounter..   JT

Try to lay it down from sight to sound


Words are ordered in a round


Struggle and search for Truth to be found


Make the silent pen with Love resound


I’ve cast many times broken morals to the ground


In Heavens Grace I hope for to the earth is my soul bound

The Lovers Day

Posted in jt, Uncategorized, Veritas et Aeuqtias with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 23, 2012 by norcaliluv

Silky smoke like letters drift across the open page.
Witness skillfully woven words as I set the stage.
Syllables come together, mingled gently as the lovers touch.


To the outsider it must seem, over done and too much.
Kisses grace the subtle beauty of the womanly shape.
Lovers heart is to kiss from feet to nape.
Envision now her pretty legs upon your page.
Chill bumps appear the maidens passion raised.
Eyes set like jewels cut of an icy slate.
At first touch lovers rise on wings of hope-filled fate.
Lightning it seemed would spark lovers bond.
In this small place sounds of love resound.
Come to me my lover, come let us play.
It’s considered blessing that lust had stained the lovers day.

Live in your lovers desire. Selfishness quenches all sincere love and decency. Last but not least may lovers be blessed with life long bonds…

All the Best,


To art or not to art…..

Posted in jt, Veritas et Aeuqtias with tags , , , , on February 26, 2010 by norcaliluv

     I am presenting here with an explanation, a poem of mine entitled “The Empty Image of Art”.  I am giving an explanation because I keep getting head scratching responses from my friends. I wrote this poem because the overwhelming majority of “art” consumed by americans is cinema. Although some cinema is good. It is for the most part empty of “capital T” truth. Which to me the artist is trying to capture and express. How do we make sense out of this world we live in? I myself enjoy many films because they are light and easy to digest. I believe this is my own personal weakness and need to hide away from my own reality. I long to be amused. Amuse is an interesting word that has among its meanings, according to the Websters New World College Dictionary 4th Addition:

” [obs.]  to engage the attention of so as to deceive; delude; bemuse”.

The [obs.] is a usage meaning explained as: ” The word or meaning is no longer used at all, although it may be found in very old writings.” 

     Well I being a traditional chap would like to resurrect it. Amusement is practically a religion itself in modern America. I personally believe it is applicable here, and so here it is:  (you may wish to read the poem first. It is up to you….)


* artful tears- Tears of or designed for manipulation

* grand wall- The  movie screen

*wizards- Companions of the Ancient Serpent

*attend upon our booth- To take our seat at the show….


The Empty Image of Art


The artful tears to warp to

warp the mind.

Fiat truth, who’s roots

a man ne’er find.


I climbed the wall

Where grand vision struck.

I saw that nothing behind

the grand vision was tucked.


The arts and the pen,

Gods good gift to man.

Now give face to nothing,

fill with nothing the empty can.


Filter we must,

with reason our passion.

Er wizards come,

and steal our good ration.


Come now dear friends

let us attend upon our booth.

Watch and remember

mere passion be not Truth.


Beauty and passion

be but little part.

While Truth, do true philosophers

instill in hearts…


Stage, canvas and paper

full of “art” they may be.

Warm hearts awake passions

Though, Truth with strife alone can one see.


So love true art,

filling not your heart with foolish lies.

For The Deceiver has slain many,

with tears and false cries…….



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